It's so easy to the comparative difficult that grips Lottie's throat. She hasn't even told John the extent of all this, everything Felipe has done with her. To her. He only managed to get a taste of the issue when she thought she was going to be hurt and— that someone should know she's alone with him? If something happens to her? (Like girl code, but crazier and more real.)
Quentin asks for it, but will he believe her? Lottie wonders this as she tastes something like acrid bile in the back of her throat. ]
felipe was mean to me and weird to me and he's a liar and insane
[ He doesn't want to believe it, but he's heard too much about Felipe to discount it entirely--and it's Lottie. If she didn't want him to hear the truth, she would just shut him down. He's heard soft euphemisms like mean and weird plenty of times in his life to know what it means when a woman says them. His stomach turns. ]
[ The lying is one thing. Realizing that she and John were close enough to break up is another. The glimpse of Felipe's reasons to be unhappy with John--it's a lot of new information, and none of it looks really great. ]
when he made you that promise was that before we all fell into the void?
i dont think he will and i dont think he can bc i didnt 'beat him down' that's just how he is and no one can change that even after the last time he did shit to me he just tried gaslighting me
[ Her lips press into a fine line. Lottie doesn't want to hear that right now, not when she wants to be mad at him. Not when she can't even count on that promise. ]
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[ But fine. ]
you should back off of felipe and let him handle his stuff himself
he isn't a good guy and you don't need that energy
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is this sth you've heard or sth you've actually seen?
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i'm being REAL with you dude
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I've told you I want to hear what you have to say before, if you're going to be real, don't be coy
Please
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It's so easy to the comparative difficult that grips Lottie's throat. She hasn't even told John the extent of all this, everything Felipe has done with her. To her. He only managed to get a taste of the issue when she thought she was going to be hurt and— that someone should know she's alone with him? If something happens to her? (Like girl code, but crazier and more real.)
Quentin asks for it, but will he believe her? Lottie wonders this as she tastes something like acrid bile in the back of her throat. ]
felipe was mean to me
and weird to me
and he's a liar
and insane
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can you tell me what he lied about
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bc he ran into my room unprompted when i was crying.. by myself... alone
and i find out like
MONTHS later from john that not only did he do it but he threatened to kill him if he came near me again
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when he made you that promise
was that before we all fell into the void?
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after the void was even worse w/him..
he went insane when he realized i moved out
and dream felipe was an a-hole :/
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I'm sorry
Thank you for telling me
If I keep trying to help him, are you gonna hate me?
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no
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He's my friend
I know he can do better if someone is willing to set him straight, not just beat him down
I can turn off caring about him
It doesn't mean I don't care about you
Or Murphy
Or anyone else
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[ Eventually, after a pause: ]
i dont think he will
and i dont think he can
bc i didnt 'beat him down'
that's just how he is and no one can change that
even after the last time he did shit to me he just tried gaslighting me
but do what u want!
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I feel like as soon as we started getting to know each other, I started screwing things up right away
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completely forgot abt that
yeah u lost major points
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I'm sorry
I'm not gonna let this bother you again
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it's cool
you have ur priorities so u do you ❤
🎀