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[pharmacy]

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Quentin Smith, 23

letters ◇ thoughts ◇ dreams

CODE BY

Comments

text; nov 4

[ghostlocked]

hey youre back right? from wherever you were during all that prison bs?

should've bugged you like a month ago but yknow. i didn't.

[pharmacy]

[ Not--not at all a person he expected to check in on him. ]

yeah, I'm back
it's more comfortable here than in the Void, go figure

do you need something?

[ghostlocked]

oh shit you were in the void? damn. ppl filled you in on what went down here right?

i dont NEED anything but i figured you were due for a check in. you good?

[pharmacy]

I'm good, at least as good as anyone who got stuck in that fucking castle

are YOU good? did you hit your head or sth?

[ghostlocked]

ok cool. yeah i'm fine why?

strange put out a whole missing person APB on you. i can't be the first person to ask if youre good.

or is shit awkward now b/c of what happened at the banquet?

[pharmacy]

no, you're not the first but like yeah tbh i wasn't exactly waiting for a welcome basket 

did stephen yell at you or sth, why are you worried about this now? 

[ghostlocked]

idk. you pissed me off but i didn't love the thought of you vanishing either. then tbh i forgot about it b/c i had other shit going on.

do you really think i'd hate you that much after one fuckin fight?

i was gonna apologize actually.

[pharmacy]

[ There's a big pause, while he considers: when was the last time he heard an apology for a fight like that? ]




okay
let's hear it

[ghostlocked]

that night was shitty for me too.

don't take that like i'm arguing it was worse than yours. or anyone elses. i'm saying i wasnt doing great by the time we ran into each other.

i was trying to help you. and you wanted to start shit instead. i remember thinking yeah lets get it out of our systems. i couldn't fight back against the shit i was pissed about and that looked like your problem too.

that was a bad idea. idk why i said the shit i said. you didn't sign up for anything that happened to you that night and none of it was your fault. i'm sorry.

[pharmacy]

[ Harlan is treated to another long quiet. While Quentin is grateful for the limited psychic input, the distance that allows him to feel his feelings as they splash up and weed them out, Harlan could probably accurately guess the reactions that roll over him. Indignation, insult, guilt. 

[ Surprise weighs heavier than the others, though. Harlan is historically squirrelly, and he's squirrelly even now, but he's thought about this all the way through. He lays it all out and he's sorry. It's...nice. ] 

I didnt want to start shit
I didnt mean to 

[ghostlocked]

well you did. but it happens.

was that blue electricity shit your monster trying to come out?

voice

[ludomania]

[ after speaking to Finch-- ]

Quentin. Are you still there? Quentin?

[pharmacy]

Hey--hey, yeah, still where? Are you okay?

[ludomania]

Yeah, I am. [ is he? ] It's good to hear your voice. Everyone else I-- Lottie's gone, did you know?

[pharmacy]

[ The nicest thing he's heard from Felipe in months is quickly overshadowed by the news. ] What? When? How do you know?

[ludomania]

Finch told me. And Farrah, she-- I'm trying to find them.

If you don't hear from me again, it means I've gone too far.

[pharmacy]

No.

[ludomania]

She'd do the same for me, Quentin.

[ not Lottie, sorry, but Farrah-- ]

earlyish november, shortly before khoriya tromps off into the void

[clawandfang]

[ a note written in a blocky hand, folded over and then slid under jin guanyao's door with "QUENTIN" scribbled on top. ]

Quentin. I wish to test the limits of the Void, and whether I might find others lost in it, as I found you.

If I am not returned within a fortnite, do not allow any others to venture in after me.

Burn this note after you read it.

[pharmacy]

[ He reads the note. He thinks of reaching out and telling Khoriya to stop, telling him don't--but if anyone is equipped to do this, wouldn't it be him and his new form?

[ Quentin doesn't reach out. Quentin doesn't burn the note. He folds into a wooden box under his bedside table, which a handful of other keepsakes--things he's holding onto until the person he got them from comes back. It looks a little strange next to things from lovers, and his stomach turns as he closes the lid and slides it away. But he's sure: it belongs there. He'll burn it when Khoriya is back. ]

dec 1

[rehandle]

[ That first day, an age ago now: Quentin safely more person than puddle as they passed him from shoulder to chest, surrendered into Takeshi's care. Early summer in the treehouse: Quentin frowning through the last of the morning's notes as Takeshi hammered nails into floorboards previously held together by spellwork and a prayer.

The word goes out somewhere between thoughts. He doesn't try to stop it. ]

Takeshi's dead.

[pharmacy]

[ Things have been either dead or tense with Quentin and Kovacs in recent months. He isn't sure if being on better terms would make hearing this less--less-- ]

how

[rehandle]

[ The remembered image of a giant stag beetle of bone: innards spilling, bone body marked with deep fissures, one huge mandible missing. No words accompany this one. There's nothing to say. ]

[pharmacy]

[ His gut lurches, as much for the sight as for imagining Stephen-- ]

where are you

[rehandle]

Home.

[ Part true. The door may be open to the treehouse, but he's sat on the floor of Takeshi's room in the brothel, back against the bed, turning his still-bloodied stack over and over in his hand. ]