[ there was a deep breath that she is trying so hard not to crumple away, how hard it is to talk of her family's personal situation to an outsider, any outsider, even one she cared for and trusted implicitly - ]
... I feel confused. I always thought he was... he was just trying to help me. Because... because I was too weak. That was how he always... always said it. He said that mother was too kind to me, too soft, and that - I never learned responsibility, so he had to do it for her. Because he loved me and wanted me to be happy. That I was dull, and stupid, and ugly, so I must learn to endure these things if I ever wanted to be married and not looked over like I always was.
no subject
He...
[ there was a deep breath that she is trying so hard not to crumple away, how hard it is to talk of her family's personal situation to an outsider, any outsider, even one she cared for and trusted implicitly - ]
... I feel confused. I always thought he was... he was just trying to help me. Because... because I was too weak. That was how he always... always said it. He said that mother was too kind to me, too soft, and that - I never learned responsibility, so he had to do it for her. Because he loved me and wanted me to be happy. That I was dull, and stupid, and ugly, so I must learn to endure these things if I ever wanted to be married and not looked over like I always was.